L.o.t. 2013 /2014 (Layers of time) I want to stop forgetting.How to keep the memory of someone alive who died 25 years ago?And how to escape a fateful sentence read on the sly in a diary 26 years ago?
I tried to answer those questions in a web based project that I called “Layers of time”.
My mother died when I was 19 and recently I noticed that the memories I have of her started fading and that the moments I remembered best were not necessarily those I want to remember. Also I realised that other people have totally different memories of her and that I do not necessarily know very much about this person who, for the first 19 years of my life, was the one I was closest to.
When I was 18 I found her diary when I was looking for something else in a drawer, it was open at a page and I read the fateful sentence: “Poor A., her life is going to be just as miserable as mine. “ I still am bewildered and also a bit angry when I think of that sentence. Why did she think my life would be miserable? And why did she think her life was miserable? Had all her life been that way? I can hardly believe that even though I do believe that she was unhappy for the last 10 years of her life …. And what do I need to do to escape this same fate ….
My project “Layers of time” was an attempt to recapture some of her life, to try to understand a bit more who this person was, to understand the context of her life … the society she was brought up in and the times that made her who she was …
Using old letters, photographs, old film reels, I tried to reconstruct this life, give it a presence online, tried to find out in how far the external circumstances in which she lived played a role in her unhappiness, but also in how far life in the beginning of the 21st century allows for more choices and more freedom in the way we live our lives.
The videos I made were a big part of the project and every short video has a theme relating to my mother and to my relationship with her.